Hottest Gays on Earth

Tom Ford and Marc Jacobs, two of the
hottest gay men on Earth, take the red carpet.

He’s just not that into you. But, this time, it’s not because you texted him five times in a row psychotically, hooked up with his best friend, or ate too many Georgetown cupcakes and now look like a beached whale. Probably the biggest disappointment for a Washingtonienne these days is when she’s working out at Vida, finds the most attractive stud she’s ever seen in her life, but then sees him leaving Cobalt arm and arm with a man that weekend. Whether you live in Dupont Circle or not, DC can truly be one, giant gay-borhood that may put a damper on your self-esteem as a female if you’re not careful. Yes, ladies, there are countless men out there who are gorgeous, professional, well-dressed and have more money than God, but be careful; In DC, if they are too good to be true, they very well may just be too good for women. Aside from DC’s usual spread of gorgeous gay men in the social scene who I refuse to name drop here with the fear of inflating their egos even larger than they already are (though I love every damn second of it), below is my list of “Oh-my-gawd, I wish they were straight”’s:


1. Ricky Martin: I cried on the day that he came out, in joy and sorrow. Of course, I’m thrilled he’s comfortable with his sexuality, but COME ON! He’s Latin AND he can shake his bon-bon? Plus, he has the two cutest twin sons in the world. I SO will be his next surrogate if he needs one, FYI.

2. Rupert Everett: I love his British accent, think he’s a phenomenal actor, and he makes me totally LMAO. Though slightly lanky for me, Rupert’s rocking the hot Londontown look to no avail.

3. Tim Gunn: He’s totally old, but the suit? The voice? The fashion forward-ness? I think he’d not only be a great family man, but would function as a superb personal shopper, gym buddy, and would peer pressure Heidi Klum into being my new BFF. And that’s fabulous.

4. Tom Ford: HAVE YOU SEEN PICTURES OF HIM?!?! Even though he’s probably a cocky fashion designer, his tall, dark, and handsome look mixed with his over-the-top fashion sense make him the perfect arm candy.

5. Marc Jacobs: On the note of Tom Ford, I’ve always had a secret thing for this designer, too. Though I’ll never grow to accept the Scottish kilt, those things can be changed. He’s handsome, apparently a huge partier, and, I would forever have access to a killer MJ wardrobe for the rest of my life.

6. Lance Bass: My childhood crush. Though he’s a little too flamboyant for me now, he was definitely one of the hottest N Syncers, in my opinion. And, he made a cameo in I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, which means he has a sense of humor about it all in the meantime.


Ladies, continue rocking it. Go out there and meet everyone you can, make new friends, and have great conversation. But keep in mind you live in Washington, DC; one of the gayest cities on Earth. And while I consider that to be a very good thing, don’t get down on yourselves, girls. The hot, straight ones are out there… somewhere. JK.